You may be aware: roses don't have thorns, they have prickles. This is a fact that the band Poison were either unaware of, or (wisely) chose to overlook in their song Every Rose Has Its Thorn.
Imagine if they hadn't overlooked it:
Every rose has its prickle
Just like every night, we gotta trickle
Just like every cowboy has a soft place to tickle
Every rose has its prickle.
Take a little good advice
Take a trip to paradise
It's really not too hard to find
If you've got it in you mind.
It's whatever turns you on.......
Goodies.........Goodies.........
It's anything you want it to be
A record or an O.B.E.
A circus or a seaside pier
We make it happen here
Fun for all the family......
Goodies........Goodies........
Goodies, goody goody yum yum
Ahhh.
Lyrics to "The Riddle" by Nik Kershaw
Following is my own (very minor!) adaptation of J.R.R.Tolkien's walking poem which I sing to my sons at night. This poem appears in various forms both in The Hobbit and in LOTR. I have not yet committed to memory the version sung by Frodo in the chapter "Three Is Company" — it's stanzas are a different format to those sung/spoken by Bilbo, and do not fit easily to the tune sung by Bilbo in the LOTR movie, nor to the tune sung by The Starlit Jewel which you can find on youtube. I might fiddle with them one day and create my own tune to use as a chorus or a coda.
Anyway, here it is. I have taken both of the versions which Bilbo recites in LOTR and put the stanzas from The Hobbit in the middle. I like how it ends with "My evening-rest and sleep to meet". The boys may get the hint one day...
I Don't Want To Live On The Moon
Written by Jeff Moss
1978 Festival Attractions, Inc. (ASCAP)
sung by Ernie (Jim Henson)
I'm learning a new song to sing to my kids at bedtime
Decisions at work provided inspiration on the train to work this morning....
Sung to Casino
With apologies to Philadelphia Grand Jury
Aaarrggh Gonna support AGIMO Tomorrow night Gonna support AGIMO And make it right What could possibly go wrong? What could possibly go wrong? What could possibly go wrong? What could possibly go wrong? Gonna support AGIMO Tomorrow night Gonna support AGIMO Watch out they bite What could possibly go wrong? What could possibly go wrong? What could possibly go wrong? What could possibly go wrong? Then it hits me ... Management lunacy Then it hits me ... CMMI Level 3 Then it hits me ... No-one knows ...... but me! Gonna support AGIMO Tomorrow night Gonna support AGIMO It's fight-or-flight go-go-go-go-go AGIMO to-to-to tomorrow night! go-go-go-go-go AGIMO to-to-to tomorrow night! What could possibly go wrong? What could possibly go wrong? What could possibly go wrong? What could possibly go wrong? Then it hits me ... Eight weeks of "warranty" Then it hits me ... Developers want to flee Then it hits me ... No-one cares ...... not me! ah-huh ok oh-no, uh-uh, no-no, won't go oh no, uh-oh what the? What's the hurry? We got no money They don't care honey, so don't you worry What's the hurry? We got no money They don't care honey, so don't you worry What's the hurry? We got no money They don't care honey, so don't you worry What's the hurry? We got no money They don't care honey, so don't you worry Say what? Gonna to support AGIMO
This is the original version from the 1980s/1990s. It's difficult to find it online today, and definitely not, the hack-job that Homer butchered on The Simpsons...
Dos Equis, a Mexican beer
Ray, the man I buy it from
Me, a guy, I buy beer for
Far, a long way to the bar
So, I think I'll have a beer
La, lalalalalala!
Tea?
No thanks, I'll have a beer
And that brings us back to....